Look! It's food!

The Journey of the Clown Kids

On Nina’s 3rd birthday, we invited our families to a small party in a restaurant. This was a cafe-based restaurant, so everybody ordered their own food, not ‘makan tengah’ ala Chinese food. Mike was seated next to his Uncle and opposite his Grandpa. These men ordered steaks. When the steaks arrived, the Uncle deliberately separated the fat from the meat. Mike found this fascinating yet confusing, but he was polite enough not to ask. On the way home, he finally asked me “Ma, why did Uncle Rudy cut off the fat from the steak and throw it away?” Oh I so got this, I thought. “Yes Mike, because eating fat is bad for our body. It can cause us bla bla bla...” Mike must’ve heard only the bla bla bla part since he interupted me, sounding impatient “B-b-but, Mama, THAT IS THE BEST PART of the whole meat! Why do you old people always hate yummy food?”

First - apparently for Mike, who is 7 - anyone who is taller than him is called ‘old people’. Second, he has made a super brilliant point here - do we, the old people, hate yummy food? Why does the yummy food bad for us? My doctor friends would probably type all the answers right now, but we are not discussing cholesterol, uric acid, cardiac arrest, or obesity. I am seeing things from my kids’ innocent point of view. Perhaps we should all listen to our kids more (wink)

Money Talks Bulls**t Walks

Di suatu sore yang panas, saya bercurhat dengan seorang sahabat nyentrik bernama C lewat salah satu media chatting. Percakapannya singkat, tetapi drama percakapan ini lalu berkembang-biak lebih hidup di dalam otak saya. Seakan-akan per-chatting-an 10 menit tadi berubah menjadi percakapan face-to-face beneran di sebuah kedai kopi Starbucks... lengkap dengan Lattee, cinnamon rolls, blackberries, oversized handbags, dan Marlboro (yang terakhir ini khusus buat C).

“Heran ya.. kenapa banyak sekali orang munafik di dunia ini,” keluh saya dengan nada putus asa.

“Baru tau loe?” sahut C cuek.

“Gue selalu kena ama orang beginian, yang mengakunya suci, sok berkelas, sok berpendidikan, tapi kenyataannya jauh euy. Ngelihat semuanya kok dari pikiran yang sempit. Gak open-minded.”

“Money Talks bulls**t walks.”

“Judgemental, prejudice...“

“Money talks bulls**t walks.”

“Coward, sok tau, reseee deh pokoknya. Benci banget ama orang-orang berjenis pretentious begini. Benci, Benci. BENCI!”

“Money talks bulls**t walks.”

“Could you please STOP saying that! Focus, girl, focus.”

“Lha ini fokus. Itu jawaban dari semua keluh kesah cengeng loe.”

“Lucu kan, C. Tuhan saja tidak pernah judgemental, ya gak? Orang yang berdosa aja masih dianggap sederajat, tidak dihakimi secara membabi buta. Apalagi disalah-salahkan, di-asbun-asbunkan, diejek-ejek. Lha kenapa manusia yang ngaku beragama dan berpendidikan banyak yang tingkahnya gak begitu? Why why ?”

“As I said...”

“DON’T!! Ya, ya gue tahu.. money talks bulls**t walks.”

“Temen gue juga banyak yang taking advantage abis-abisan. Yang menghakimi gue dengan norma-norma mereka sendiri.Tapi lucunya di depan gue manis banget, apalagi kalau ada perlunya. Jangan tanya deh kalau di belakang gue..”

Kita dan Teman Sejati

Banyak pepatah bijaksana yang menjelaskan apa artinya seorang teman sejati. Wejangan mengenai teman sejati biasanya berkisar kepada sifat-sifat seorang teman sejati, yaitu selalu siap di sisi kita pada saat senang dan susah. Wejangan selanjutnya menegaskan betapa sedikitnya orang-orang di sekeliling kita yang bisa disebut teman sejati. Teman sejati itu bak barang mewah, yang tidak mungkin bisa didapat secara diskon, buy one get one free atau di acara midnight sale. Ada yang mengistilahkan teman sejati itu ibarat branded product limited edition. Kalau sudah begini, keluarlah segala macam keluh kesah kita, yah mana bisa kebeli dengan harga segitu, jumlahnya limited banget, masa mesti rebutan antri berhari-hari. Mesti beli yang asli kah? Beli yang imitasi aja kali sudah cukup...kan gak ada yang tau ini... mungkin betul, tapi kita sendiri kan tahu. Masa mau membohongi diri sendiri?

Di umur kita yang sekarang, mencari teman sejati itu susah-susah gampang. Agak berbeda dengan saat kita sekolah dulu. Pada saat itu kita dikeliligi oleh begitu banyak manusia-manusia sebaya. Kita tidak mau berteman pun, tetap saja kebanjiran teman.
Dengan bertambahnya usia, kesempatan kita untuk mendapat teman baru biasanya lebih terbatas. Karena kita ketemunya orang-orang yang itu-itu lagi, di lingkungan yang itu-itu lagi. Kita juga semakin menyadari betapa berharganya teman-teman sejati.

Perlu ada sekolah atau les privat buat menjadi teman sejati? Sebenarnya sih tidak perlu, karena kita kan sudah punya hati nurani. Yang biasanya menjadi problem adalah kita terlalu berharap bahwa orang lainlah yang harus berusaha untuk menjadi teman sejati BUAT kita. Kita sering lupa kalau kita sendiri bisa menjadi teman sejati BUAT orang lain.

Defying Gravity

(an anger note)

The people who can hurt you the most are usually the people who are close to you the most, because they know the location of your heart and they know how to break it easily into pieces, leaving you shatter and hurting beyond any pain and any reasons imaginable.

When I experienced that kind of hurt, I always do what I am best at doing... running away. It may not be the best solution, but I don’t know how to express the pain or dissapointment, let alone my reasons to those people who hurt me.

So, I am running...I hope I will meet other people during my run-away moment, who sincerely appreciate and respect me for who I am. People who will stand by me, stand by my cause and reasons throughout the day and night, and not just in the darkest room when noone else are around, then abandon me in the daylight when all eyes are on them. I want to meet other people who will understand me and protect me, who will never sacrifice me to fulfill their own need, their own greed, their own fear, and their own insecurity.

I hope that I am running in right path towards Mount Olympus or Heaven like some people call it these days, because I am in the dire need to speak to God. Not to desperately question Him, just want to feel His words of wisdom and peace all over again.

What does mellyberry mean?

Ada beberapa teman yang bertanya apa arti nama ‘mellyberry’ yang saya pakai di blog saya. Inilah cerita sepintas mengenai latar belakang lahirnya nama kebangsaan tersebut.

Semuanya berawal dari sebuah benda mungil bernama blackberry...

Long long time ago...saya tidak suka blackberry, bisa dibilang pendukung grup anti-blackberry. Tidak perlulah dijelaskan alasan amburadul saya membenci blackberry. Saya sering sekali mengejek teman-teman saya yang ber-blackberry. Diantara sekian banyak teman saya yang memakai blackberry , ada satu orang yang selalu menasihati saya berkenaan dengan sifat anti-blackberry saya. “Kalau tak kenal, maka tak sayang.” Kita sebut Ibu yang bijaksana ini dengan inisial 805LP. Beliau ini sosialita kondang, jadi untuk alasan keamanan perlu bagi saya untuk menyamarkan nama aslinya. Sekedar tambahan saja, 805LP jugalah yang memperkenalkan Facebook kepada saya yang asli orang gaptek. (Ini efek positif kalau hang out dengan sosialita tampaknya. *nyengir*).

Lalu tibalah suatu hari saya mendapat hadiah blackberry dari sang suami. Aihh senangnya. Segala mitos dan cibiran anti blackberry saya langsung sirna sekejap, secepat gelembung permen karet meletus. Memang benar kata Ibu 805LP tadi, tak kenal maka tak sayang. Hidup saya serasa lebih sibuk dengan hadirnya si mainan ajaib ini. Saat saya berhasil mengaktifkan blackberry saya, si Ibu 805LP ini dengan sukacitanya menulis status sebagai berikut “Welcome Mellyberry”. Ibu 805LP ini orang yang baik hati, jadi saya yakin bahwa status tadi ditulis dengan segala ketulusan hatinya. Memang benar-benar berniat mem-welcome saya ke dunia blackberry yang gegap gempita. Tapi, karena dulunya saya terkenal pedas kalau menyindir para pemakai blackberry, ucapan welcome mellyberry membuat saya jadi merasa bersalah. “Halah, dari dulu kek bergabung dengan para berries, pakai protes-protesan segala.”

Pu Tien and my comfort zone

This weekend was my in-laws’ birthdays and the family has decided to celebrate it in a far away restaurant called Pu Tien in Sawah Besar. I couldn’t believe my eyes when I received the complete address of the restarurant in my phone. Was this for real? Would they be requiring passports to enter that zip code? For a person who lives mostly in the South (suburb) part of the town, my farthest trip to the city is to Bundaran HI and then back. Even though I heard so many people telling me interesting stories about the life beyond Bundaran HI, I was never been intrigued to visit. So, this weekend apparently I was forced to try something new, entirely.

Talking about ‘try something new’, I am kinda pathetic in this department. I’ve been teaching my kids to always ‘try something new’ and keep their minds open. And I usually brag to other people that I am the champion of the ‘trying something new’ stuff (at least I am a better try-er than my husband). But everytime when situation presents me with something completely different from what I know, I dutifully retreat back. I guess what I forgot to say all along is that, I don’t mind trying something new as long as it still lies within my comfort zone. Bundaran HI is my comfort zone. Anything new within my borders are acceptable. Meaning, I am willing to give it a try. Unfortunately (for my mind), anything new outside my borders are not-that-easily-acceptable.

How many times do you feel that way? Don’t we usually judge that ‘something new outside my border’ is bad? It’s not comfortable to be out of our comfort zone, indeed. But staying too long in our comfort zone makes us lazy and ignorant. The simple answer to this problem is to (simply) try something new a little step at a time. And for me, this little step was driving accross my Kingdom to the FarAway Land to have a birthday party with my family.